Why do we still dress up for church?
I had a very interesting weekend. On Saturday I got up and got ready for church. I was preaching that day so I had plenty to do. I took a shower I trimmed off my manly gotee to a much more metro look. I got my suit out of the closet. Picked out a nice white shirt and a green stripped tie. I fastened my cuff links and laced up my shinny shoes. They could have used a polish, no doubt, but they were still looking pretty good. Trimmed, shaved, groomed, and suited I got on my scooter and went to church.
On Sunday I went to visit a local community church with my wife and daughter. I got up, showered, put on an everyday pair of casual khaki pants with a black button up shirt and flip flops. We hoped in the van and went to church. And when I got to church I was pleasantly relieved and peaceful to see the pastor preaching in a button up short-sleeve shirt with jeans and Adidas tennis shoes on.
I am going to get on a bit of a soap box today so take it as such. But I have the bible to back me up on this one. Paul gives instructions to Timothy in chapter two of his first letter concerning dress. He is addressing the women of the congregation and warns against extravagant adornment. Instruct the women to dress with all modesty, and all decency and propriety not with braiding their or gold or pearls or expensive clothes. But with good deeds appropriate for a woman who professes to worship God.
Don't worry all you wounded adventists out there this is not going to turn into an anti jewelry campaign. And truth be told I'm not even going to focus on women, shocking I know. I am going to once again ask the question, why do we dress up for church!!!
"Haven't you read in Revelation, where it says the bride is adorned for her husband with all kinds of jewels?" Yes I have. "Haven't you read about how the priest wore all the finest robes and jewels when they served in the temple?" Yes I have. I have also read when the people of israel came to meet God on say...the day of atonement. They took off all of their finery and went as simply adorned as possible and David took off his kingly robe and danced before the Lord in his plain linen garment.
The point I'm interested in here is WE DON'T NEED TO DRESS UP FOR GOD!!!! He loves us as we are. He accepts us as we are. We are with God every day of our lives, he is always there so why do we need to get dressed up for him at church? The truth is we aren't getting dressed up for him. We are getting dressed up for each other.
Have you ever gone to hot dog on a stick at the mall and seen those poor employees there dressed up in their striped shirt and little hats. I feel so sorry for them every time I see them. You know why they wear those outfits? Because management says so, because it is the uniform for their work. We all wear different uniforms based on the expectations of the people around us. So we dress for church they way people expect us to. That's all!
There is nothing wrong about looking "nice" for church. There is nothing wrong with dressing up for church. Unless of course you are spending exorbitant amounts of money on your clothing, which you could be using to...feed children in africa or something. (Which can go for designer jeans and well as designer suits by the way.) God likes beauty, he made a beautiful world. There is nothing wrong with looking beautiful or handsome.
Here is the thing that bothers me about dressing up for church. Are we putting on a mask to go to church? Are we fixing up our appearances to try and fix up our lives? If we have all our buttons lined up and the tie just strait enough, will people be more likely to think we have our lives all lined up too? Is dressing up, dressing differently then we do the rest of the week playing a role on a stage? Do we actually push people further away and make it all the easier to respond, "I'm fine" when inside we are broken?
It is strange to me, there are people in my church who only know me as a guy in a suit which I only wear one once a week and only for a few hours. The rest of the week I'm a guy in jeans. To tell you the truth I would rather be the same guy in both places. I would rather be authentic and real in both places. I can do that regardless of the clothes I am wearing it is true. But as scripture tells us man judges on the outward appearance where God judges on the heart. So to help man out it might be good for him to see me as I am.
What ever you wear to church or in your daily life for that matter, may it not get in the way of relationship. I pray for authenticity in my life and yours. If we are going to shape the opinion of others of who we are, may we do it by our lives instead of our clothes.
Thank you pastor Cory. I certainly appreciate this perspective (especially on Saturday morning when we're rushing around getting ready to go - maybe you could do a post on why Sabbath School starts so early for your next rant). Allow me to present a thought.
ReplyDeleteI used to be in sales. Some of my appointments were in person, but often I was managing my territory hiding behind my telephone. No one except my co-workers (also managing their territories on the phone part of the time) and the managers. The customers can't see me, so why dress up? I can tell you from years of personal experience that I felt & acted differently when I was dressed up - even on the phone. I sat up a little straighter and felt more "professional" when I was dressed nicely and tended to sometimes feel a little more "slouchy" when I was not. So, even though no customers could see me, I came to work most days dressed in slacks or a skirt and a nice top--sometimes even a jacket.
Translate this to church. I have to admit that as much as I'd like to come to church in sweats or jeans, I do feel a little better coming dressed up. Not super fancy. Slacks and a nice top. A dress. A blouse and skirt.
It also makes a difference for our kids. In my experience kids generally act differently when they are dressed in shorts & tennis shoes than they do when they are dressed in nice clothes. Dressing up does often lead (some of) us to act a little more reverently. And it shows the kids that God is special. He is someone we respect and deserves our best.
Our best doesn't have to be a $200 dress or $1000 suit. It doesn't have to be something new & fancy every week. But something a little nicer than what we wear every day can make a difference.
Don't get me wrong. I totally get that my experience is totally different than yours. Because it makes me feel different and special, doesn't mean that it makes anyone else feel the same way.
I just wanted to share a different perspective :)
Cheers!
Cindy Birmingham
So, Corey, why do you wear suits if you know it isn't authentic for you? Now I'll grant you, PVC isn't exactly the most warm and welcoming place, but surely as a member of church leadership you have a responsibility to challenge weak believers to strengthen their belief through dealing with inconsistencies in their thought process (i.e. that one MUST dress up for church.) Crosswalk SDA down in Redlands, not a single pastor there ever wore a suit, I was even known to show up in whatever jeans I had on, hole or no hole, and occasionally rather odd t-shirts (i.e. a picture of Chuck Norris with a gun and the caption "Chuck Norris, a life full of accomplishment." (I really loved that shirt.) Anyway... I'm not a big suit guy either, but I'm sure you've seen me wearing the suit at church now and then. So, don't feel too bad, it isn't like you're the only one who bows to the pressure. I guess the question is, is that what God wants... I guess what it comes down to is this - which is the bigger stumbling block - wearing clothes you don't believe in so as not to offend others who don't understand that clothes aren't important, or challenging those people to rethink their views and gain a deeper understanding of the love of God as their foolishness is stripped away from them, even if the manner is something they find uncomfortable. Let me know if you figure out the answer to that question, its one I still struggle with.
ReplyDeleteCheers,
Ethan
Oh Corey this was great! The part about "If we have all our buttons lined up and the tie just strait enough, will people be more likely to think we have our lives all lined up too? Is dressing up, dressing differently then we do the rest of the week playing a role on a stage? Do we actually push people further away and make it all the easier to respond, "I'm fine" when inside we are broken?" Spoke to me so true. My family and I are fairly low income and I truly believe that we dress up for church so that no one else knows this. It's hard holding that mask over the entire family though... Thank you for covering this. And a side rant perhaps? Why do the children in Sabbath school look as if they are dressed for weddings? My kids can ever compete with that.
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Nichole
(first off two side notes: #1 to the questions about wedding dress for kids in SS. - It is difficult to find inexpensive 'casual business' style clothing for children - it seems to be either 'fancy' or t-shirts - with little in-between, except at places like Land's End. Particularly for girls!
ReplyDelete#2 to the comment that PVC is not the warmest, most welcoming place - wow - what is going on there? That is not the PVC I remember - how sad.)
Now, to comment on what Cory said - You are absolutely 100% right, we are dressing up for other people, not for God. That is what I LOVE about Grace Fellowship - our new church - it is a place where people can be real, and comfortable, it's not about show, or seeing who has what new dress or jewelry. Some people wear very fancy clothes, because that is what they like to do, some wear jeans and t-shirts because that is how they are comfortable, and we all sit and worship God together THAT is what matters. I wish that every church could be like that. Our pastor gave an excellent sermon just a few weeks ago about the difference between Principle (modesty) and Preference (style of dress) You might want to have a listen if you get a chance. He pastors several congregations, which are a broad spectrum of worship styles, so we had some fun conversations the next week about whether he was 'practicing' on us, to work up the nerve to preach it at his other congregations, because he had power points and everything, and he kept saying things like "I know I'm at Grace, and you guys already 'get' this, but..." Anyway - good thoughts. Thanks for sharing.
PS - you still need an editor??
wow, who knew dressing up for church would get more response than any of my previous blogs! This is craziness, lol. Thank you all for your comments. I would say once again, I have no problem with people dressing up for church in they want to (with the extravagance clause in there.) There are many people who dress in suits and ties or slacks and blouses every day, this is part of who they are. It is not a change of persona for them. They are completely authentic in who they are in both places.
ReplyDeleteIt is also interesting to me we are talking so much specifically about types of clothes (which is my fault admittedly) when the main point for me is simply being real with people around you. This comes into each part of our lives including dress, actions, speech, etc.
PVC has been a welcoming place for me, these comments and thoughts come much more from my own thoughts and the expectations I have placed upon myself. One of the times I showed up to PVC with jeans on I actually had someone say they thought I looked very nice and more comfortable in my own skin, which they liked.
Cindy, I am glad you enjoy dressing in slacks and blouses. I encourage you to continue representing yourself in the truest light possible. I am all for kids learning how to offer respect to those around them. I also hope they learn how to share their lives with others and not feel like they need to have it all together to come to church. I don't think you were saying this, I'm simply emphasizing my own soap box.
Ethan, I have thought about the challenging the comfortable question myself. We shall see where God leads me in this.
Nicole, I hope these thoughts give you some freedom to be real with who you are and the situation you and your family are in. If the church cannot accept and care for each other how do we expect to chance the world.
Sharon, the sermon sounds very interesting. and PS yes I still need and editor, lol!
I'm pretty sure it's posted on our church website if you ever have time to listen to it - you and Pastor Arroyo would get along quite well, I think, he is a young guy, not yet gone to seminary (was supposed to go last year, but conf. budget cuts kept him here) nice guy!! (gracefellowshipadventist.org) ( I might be able to edit for you, though it's not a profession for me, I can at least catch the glaring stuff!) Just e-mail me copies, before you post them, and I'll turn them around as fast as I can. -- Maybe I should have you edit MINE, before I post on it too!) lol!!
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